photo credit: Sami Hobbs |
Day 2
One day stands out in particular as
the absolute breaking point for this type of empty living: my daughter’s
third birthday. My husband was deployed to Kuwait with the Navy so
communication between the two of us was incredibly sporadic. During the first three months he was away we
talked on the telephone one time and I received about 1 email a week. My daughter has had breathing issues since
birth and this day she was having a hard time with her illness. My car
had a flat. The weather was dreary and overcast. One by one the
guests of the birthday party were cancelling due to sickness and inclement weather.
I had spent way too much money for a party I was not even interested in
throwing. I FELT ALL ALONE.
The party happened. I made
my way home feeling unheard by GOD but desperate because there was nowhere else
to turn. I put my daughter to bed. I went in the living room,
turned out all the lights and laid on the floor… and cried and KEPT
CRYING. And I remember pleading, begging toward the ceiling with words
something like, “GOD I can’t take this. You have got to do something in
my life. I am alone and feel desperate for something ANYTHING TO DO
to feel that my identity is valuable to you. I have nowhere else to go
LORD.
"Lord,
to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life."
-John 6:68
So, I prayed the prayer that night and
I went to bed with that feeling of being heard but with no real idea what was
coming next.
photo credit: Howie Mapson |
Spiritual:
1.
Has
there been a time in your life where change was occurring in a way that was
unexpected? Are you in a place right now where change is
inevitable/unavoidable? What does change look like to you? What area of your life SPECIFICALLY do you
need change to happen?
2.
Look
at the following verses to see other examples of “suddenly” moments and write
down what you find. Is there any particular one that speaks SPECIFICALLY
to this point in time in your life?
Genesis
37:7
Number
16:42
Judges
14:5
2 Kings
2:11
Job
1:19
Proverb 28:18
Isaiah 48:3
Daniel 5:5
Acts 2:2
Acts 9:3
Creative:
1.
Do
you currently have a creative outlet that you allow yourself to use as a time
for worship? What has that activity done for you personally and in your
life’s circumstances? How much time are you able to devote time to this?
2.
Have
you considered trying a new artistic medium? If so, what things do you need to
do to begin exploring this? What roadblocks are in the way?